A Reconciliatory Leader
A major thing to look out for in a leader is RECONCILIATION.
A leader who has a retinue of offended and estranged friends or different forms of relationships, is a leader to be wary of for two major reasons:
- Lasting Hurt – a leader who has left so many people hurt and has never looked back to in all sincerity try to fix things will do it again to you. They’re often known for irreparable damage and lasting Hurt. The way I know they’ll do it again to you is that conflicts will always arise but such leaders fight to the finish. They release words and act in a way that suggests they’re not interested in future resolutions. They often fight dirty and to the finish. Love does NOT constrain them. Fighting with such a person will make you a victim and for a long time. This is why it’s better to stay away.
- Reconciliation – A leader MUST be given to reconciliation especially if you’re named by the name of The Lord. We are first called to the ministry of reconciliation (2Cor5:18-19). So AGAIN, if you look back and you see a history of offended friends who served and loved him or her, or a history of estranged friends be very wary. The cane that was used for the first wife is oftentimes waiting for the second wife.
God Himself exemplified Leadership when He goes to seek and save the lost, when He comes close to an offended party, when He says to you when He’s not your mate AT ALL “come let’s reason together”. God was and is okay by Himself but He went on a mission of reconciliation not considering our errors but determined to reconcile the humanity He owns and created, to Himself
Seek a leader whose major fulcrum and axis is love; love practised, love apparent, love unfeigned.
Seek a leader who can get into a discussion with you and will not be quick to throw his or her status (age, wealth and experience) into the discuss because s/he knows regardless of his or her exposure, life can throw you a curve and you must remain teachable.
Seek a leader whom when you get into a heated disagreement and lines are crossed, you know your leader is well armed to deal you a verbal blow below the belt that will firmly put you in your place, but instead you see hot tears well up in his or her eyes because he or she is constrained by love; love for his or her maker and love for you
Seek a leader who makes mistakes, admits his or her humanity, takes full responsibility and is not afraid or ashamed to say “I’m sorry”
I don’t have all the nuggets you need to find in a leader, whether for marital, relational, occupational, mentoring or spiritual relationship but who you embrace as a leader can either propel you forward light years or set you back 10years.
And whilst you’re seeking any form leadership to help you grow, remember the greatest form of leadership you must first have, is the Leadership of yourself. You will give account for YOU when it’s all been said and done.
